That One Sad Day

On Dec. 29th, 2012 I received one of the worse calls I have yet to receive to this day.

4:35 a.m. *phone rings from "Big Bruh" I listen and I hear him talking and his wife. I can't make out what's being said so I start yelling, "Mont! Mont! Mont!" Hoping he'd answer but nothing. Abt 2 mins later the phone drops and Lamont starts yelling and screaming and his wife picks it up and says, "Tina?" I respond, "huh". She says, "get up here now. Get up here now!" I respond, "I'm on my way. What's going on? Where yall at? She says, -"just get here. We're at St. Louis University hospital." I hang up and I throw on my clothes and rush down the steps. Immediately I say to myself, Lord is it my Daddy? As I'm running down the steps my mom wakes up and hears me and says, "who is that?" I say, "mama it's me. I gotta get to st louis university hospital. Mont just called I think something wrong with daddy." She jumps out of bed and says, "I'm going with you. Lord don't let it be." I want for her. We get in the car and head to the hospital. I'm shaking and wondering what is going on?? Don't let it be death Lord. Mama drive faster. I need to be there. (All the thoughts running through my mind)... we funny arrive, my mama grab my hand and we go in the hospital. I go to the emergency room's Secretary and say, "my brother just called Me and told me to come here. He and his wife?" She says, they're in the room behind you but I will call the Chaplin." My mom squeezes my hand, we turn to the door behind us and we go in to find, my brother, sister, and sister-in-law. They are all crying. The Chaplin comes in and says, "Is William Parker you're father?" My mom says, "Yes. She's his daughter and I'm her mother." He says, I'm sorry to tell you this but William passed away..." I immediately start crying..... Time passes, more ppl come. I go see my daddy and kiss him for the last time then I head out with my mom.

I told yall the whole story bc that's how it plays to me every single day. There has not been a day that I have not thought abt that early morning phone call and all that followed it. My Daddy was a sharp man. Smart, hardworking, cared for his kids and more, could dress his tail off (loved him a nice looking outfit straight out the cleaners), an awesome cook, giving, goofy, silly, funny, a party animal and more. He was also a drinker, a crack addict (I later learned), weak in physical strength bc of too many accidents, etc. BUT at the end of the day, he was my Daddy. Today I was awaken by a horrible dream that had my Daddy and I woke and had tears in My eyes. I couldn't believe I was crying in my sleep. I miss him so much. I was angry with him for so many years not knowing the demons he'd fought for some years I'm his life. Now all I wish for is a day to dance, laugh, sing, drink, and eat together. Daddy didn't have a lick of rhythm but you couldn't keep him of a dance floor. He could cook anything he wanted and make you fall in love with his food. He would pour you a drink and laugh and sing with you all night until he put you out his house. Lol... that was my Daddy. I'm still mourning the lost of him. I know there's a better day but right now I miss him.

Yall are my girls and I just wanted to share this with yall bc I don't have anyone else to share it with. I hate that Im not financially stable enough to do all I want to do with you all and bc of that I feel like I'm losing you too. Although I KNOW that I'm not. It just feels that way for now. But in the meantime I am working hard to put myself in a better situation so that I can bounce back, full fledge and Rock this boat better than before. I love yall and thank you for taking time to read my story.

Kelly

P.s. please excuse the misspelled word and such. I wrote this at 4:20 this a.m. when I was awaken by a horrible dream.